UK Home Secretary Alan Johnson has revealed an amazing plan to convert the traditional outcome of a typical night out in the UK – glassing – into mere denting, according to an Associated Press report. He aims to swap ordinary glass glasses for more nanny-friendly shatterproof versions.
- “British Home Secretary Alan Johnson holds two prototype pint glasses designed not to break up into dangerous shards on impact” – Associated Press
Phase two is rumoured to involve the production of non-stinging beer and splashproof tumblers. Each year, literally tens of Londoners suffer mild drink-related eye trauma due to careless carousing.
Also on the cards are blunt cocktail sticks; non-exploding maraschino cherries (the alcohol and sugar can easily be converted into semtex); and a genetically modified lemon that can be sliced without leaving sharp edges.
Woke up this mornin’
My water was brown
This was quite disturbing
So I went to the water company’s website and it had very little useful information to indicate whether it was safe for me to drink it or not.
[Da na nah na nah]